Sunday, August 27, 2017

The Day After the Best Day



The Day After the Best Day
It’s funny how I want certain days to linger
Almost drowning in all of the goodness
Exhausted from the fun
Yet, a night of sleeping later
I awake to a sense that all of that is now a memory
There is stillness in the now
Unknowing in the future
I reach back to see what’s left from yesterday
And find much treasure there
Yet I know I cannot dwell there
Missing the treasure of today
The hope of tomorrow
I find that gratefulness keeps the memories whole
Fresh amongst the newly blooming flowers
Gratefulness keeps me right where I need to be
In the center of all of God’s goodness
So I take this moment in the right here and right now
I thank You for bringing me here
Everything has turned out for good
Just like You said it would

I am so thankful



Sunday, August 20, 2017

The Throne





The Throne
You know
I could drone on like the typical sad poet
But then I thought, “today
I don’t have to do that at all”
Yes there is darkness, evil, and ugliness
But there is also light, good, and beauty

I get to choose which one to focus on

Even in the midst of the chaos
I can settle right into the midst of the order
Even in the midst of death
I can choose to continue to live
And love

For that might just be the key

To love in the midst of everything
Might just be the source of all freedom
The source of all light, all good, all beauty

So I want to rest there
I want to run there
I want to sleep there
I want to dwell there

The place where I choose love over all other things

Might just be the most powerful place in the universe

Saturday, August 19, 2017

T=mg+ma




T=mg + ma
These paradoxes are killing this Western man
I’m told that giving up is the way to life
Then giving up is the way to shame
I’m told that rest brings me to peaceful healing
Yet I rest and become more lame
I’m not saying the truth is a lie
But what I am saying is that life seems immutably impossible
And I’m not really sure what I should do
The scientists attribute the darkness to biology
The preachers attribute the biology to darkness
In a culture of “I must know everything”
I think we know nothing, nothing at all
Suddenly I find this earth I’ve been anchored to
Is floating aimlessly in space
Possibly not aimlessly
Possibly toward a great destruction
Possibly toward miraculous life
I am told that this is my greatest decision
Is it really the electrons traversing the axons
That determines the universe’s fate?
Is it true we’re just a micron of a meaningless speck?
Like I said, the tension betwixt these two is so great
I feel I’m being torn in two
The dangers of that are none too few
Yet neither are the abundance of the treasures






Image by La Boheme, Google Images

Sunday, August 13, 2017

Outside


Outside
Im glad to hear children playing outside
Their laughter permeating all walls and barriers
Breaking through the barricades
Tearing down the bleak tirades
Of shortening days and greater distances
Greater distances that must be spanned
With great tenacity, greater veracity
All contained within the sounds of children laughing

I place my head on pillows soft
Gazing through windows, mineral-flaked, aloft
The power lines cutting through the gray skies
Golden, red, and fading-green leaves
Holding on for dear life
Even though death has clearly already come
But has it really?
Doesn’t the tree still stand?
It’s roots gone deeply into the life-giving land
Though the visibilities show death even still
Death cannot overcome life’s greater love-will

All this I see outside the window sill
The window not covered with stained interventions
Just deposits from the lives spent and gone
I lie here in the comfort of this throne

To overcome and to span the greater distances.

Wednesday, August 9, 2017

Choices



Choices
Too many choices now
I could spend the rest of my days
Searching for everything that is nothing
Toys, games, vacations, wares
Clothes, phones, mutual fund shares
I don’t even have to get up from the couch
I can sit here like a leather slouch
Consuming all that comes into my orbits
Yet there is always this stirring
There is always this stirring deep within
No rhyme, no reason, no cry, no whim
Seems to meet it or explain it
I think we all are made for something more
I think we all go beyond the meandering bore
Of the retail mall circuit
Not that any of the things we need are bad
Not that any of the things we want are ugly
But they do not define the who we are
They do not fulfill the rising star
That is continuously rising within our chests
I look for answers, I look for rest
It seems like it is only where the stillness resides
It seems it is where the mystery hides
It seems to go beyond all the reason
No shape, no circle, no time, no season
Seems to contain it at all

I look forward to the cool of fall
As I choose to go walk up the mountain

8/9/17

Sunday, August 6, 2017

Upturned


Upturned
Overwhelmed
I cannot tell if it is evil
I cannot tell if it is good
It might even be both
Just being tossed heels over head
Is this life or is this death?
Who can tell in these deep, cold waters?
Or maybe all of this tumult
Is a sign I am almost to the shore
But is that really where I want to be?
Didn’t I cry out for the deep?
Didn’t I ask to be here?
Yes
Yes I did.
So I have nothing to fear
I simply relax

Enjoying the swimming

Sunday, July 30, 2017

The Battle



The Battle
Sometimes I just sit and ponder
and wonder
At the great, great beauty of the world,
Versus the great, great evil
At first I thought all the evil was found
where people were 
I was right
However, then I realized
Some of the greatest beauty was found 
Where people were, where the people are
So people aren’t the problem
It points to a deeper source
A source hidden and dark and slithering
The tension of it all
Beautiful wonder there to cause me to erupt in wondrous joy
While at the same time the heartbreak of darkness leads me to put a gun to my head
Pulling the trigger
Scattering all those visions of grisly horror and tumult away
That wouldn’t do a damn thing
The evil would still exist
And there would be one less soldier to fight it
I fight a battle that is part of a great war
The war has been won already
Yet there are up-risers on the loose
I stray away from the meaning of this day
To see the extremes of great beauty and great horror
All existing on this same planet
Which one will overcome?
Isn’t it amazing…

It is up to you and to me to decide




*Image is not mine, but was obtained from Google Images

Friday, July 21, 2017

Determined



Determined
I haven’t written in quite some time
In prose or poetry or broken rhyme
I’ve simply walked along the pathways
Living life, watching days
Drifting along as the ancient sails
Their ancient groans and cries and wails
Still circle this blue globed earth
Still fill the seas with joy and mirth
As they are accompanied by the sailors’ songs
This rambunctious evening, this darkness long
Has held the silence my mind is craving
No other thing has been more enslaving
Than this debacle going through my mind
This devils’ treatise, this going blind
Through the never ending ways of busyness
Through the never ending void of soft caress
I have succeeded in what is seen, I have not in the sublime
So before I leave this meandering rhyme
I am determined to know my life’s source
Whether lion, ostrich, lamb, or horse
I am determined to know the difference 

That simply being me can be

Wednesday, July 19, 2017

Significant



Significant
It’s quiet here
But life is noisy
The real world is full of noise and chaos
So why do I like the silence so much?
What is it here that makes me feel alive?
Out there in the bustle I am a loner, a misfit
The flashing screens make my brain repulse 
The noise, the empty conversations
The things that fill the every day that really don’t matter at all
The things that in the future will be dust
I just
Cannot live like that at all
I cannot also judge those that do
It is not up to me what is up to you
But I simply cannot join in the great milieu
Of sport and cars and hotel stays
So I put on my hiking boots once more
I pick up my camera and amongst shouts of “bore!”
I walk up to the mountains
I seek my place where God and I 
Can have a conversation
Where I can actually hear what he has to say
Often there are no words to pray
There is simply the majesty of the snow-capped mountains
To remind me I am small
Yet I am also very, very great

Tuesday, July 4, 2017

Walk


Walk
Can I walk with a pen?
Can I take steps along paths unknown
Along the ways of wisdom known for ages?
To see what has yet to be seen
To hear what has yet to be heard
Words that have always been spoken
Do I have eyes to see, ears to hear?
Do I have a heart that yearns to endear
Or am I even supposed to worry about myself?
Maybe I should just take the steps
Put the pen to the paper
Walk the walk, talk the talk
Holding on to all things eternity
Breathing in all things eternal
I lift up my simple life, a kernel
And die.

The first step is taken


Now I await for life to awaken
Within
Without
Despite the dark and the lingering doubt
The birds are singing in the branches

Monday, July 3, 2017

Mountain Journey



Mountain Journey
I have seen the vast mountain ranges
Covered in snow
Here I stand
A gnat amongst the Milky Way
Yet they beckon
These rising behemoths beckon
To come and see what dwells inside
See it is not just the visible beauty
There to be discovered
There is the more magnificent deep within
Waiting to be uncovered
Here, this place, is where life’s meanings are found
This place, here, is where true life resounds
I take a step
My feet sink into the snow
This process might be cold and slow
But I must take my place among the mountain tops

Thursday, June 29, 2017

Chasing



Chasing
I get tired of chasing inspiration
I get frustrated with interruptions
This ever-gnawing, ever-present desire
Something beyond words, a burning fire
So deep within I cannot see it nor hear it
Yet I most assuredly can feel it
It is my life calling me forth
It is life itself calling me into the beyond
Beyond normalcy, beyond status quo
Even beyond the knowns of excellent and good
Into realms of even better and best
Places of peace, places of rest
Where I have no part in a chaotic hurricane
Rather I stand in the cooling rain
Just taking in the rainbows from the sunshine
It’s light is there no matter the circumstances
No matter the mistakes, the crushed romances
No matter the costs, the worries, the trials
No matter the doubts, curses or dark denials
Light does shine, darkness doesn’t argue
My every lot, my every sinew
Is washed anew in this effervescence 

Wednesday, June 28, 2017

Reclining



Reclining
I could sit here in this chair all day
Pondering the mysteries and wonders before me
And when the day is over and done
I am deeper into the struggle than ever before
Knowing less but feeling more
Closer to You than ever before
Closer to me

I can watch the sweeps dance across the waters
I can see the ducks resting in the rain
As I sit here in this recliner seeing it all
Writing out a simple refrain
I sense I am walking to something deeper
Something beyond the dark and the pain
Though I am more still than I have ever been

The rain keeps on falling and falling
The water keeps on accepting the earth
The sound of its music brings laughter
Its moisture brings clouds in the mirth
Heightening mirth more than ever before
Changing the sounds of the earth
Closer to You than ever before, still even closer to me

The wind has joined in with the laughter
The grasses now see they are green
It reminds me that my heart is a flower
It blooms in the realms that cannot be seen
Changing the sounds of the earth
Closer to You than ever before
Ever closer, even closer to free

I see

Thursday, June 22, 2017

Shadows on the Parking Lot



Shadows on the Parking Lot
I walk along during the late afternoon
The sun still high enough to make it like mid-day
The geometric shapes of shadows line the bay
They have changed
But yet they still are patterns
I wonder why all these patterns
All these equations
All these predictabilities 
Come from One Who is unpredictable
From One Who has no form
No shape, no patterns that He would ever fit into
I wonder what would I say, what would I do
If I ever had the chance to meet Him
Right there, in my face, in my person
What would that be like?
I’m sure it wouldn’t be like these dark and quiet shadows
Shifting with the angles of the sunlight
I’m sure it wouldn’t be predictable
Though likely predictably incredible
Awe-inspiring, shaking, thundering
These geometric shapes have changed
Yet still there is a pattern
Maybe there is message here
That the methods can change
And change with time
Yet there is always the pattern of love

The geometric shapes of shadows line the bay
Yet the sun is still high enough to make it like mid-day

Wednesday, June 14, 2017

Sensing



Sensing
I have sensed the poetic
Yet I have yet to engage it
That delight seems to flit around in great whimsy and flight
When I try to approach it with determination and might
It surely just whisps away
Or possibly I might squash it like an annoying ant
Under the padding of my thumb
I cannot enter the world of numb
I simply, simply cannot
I must feel the joy along with the pain
I must imbibe the sunshine along with the rain
Because both are essentially life-giving
I’d rather hurt in the land of the living
Than be eternally numb in the realms of the dead
I touch the fear, I feel the dread
Yet this fire within me will consume it
I will not take it for granted, nor will I assume it
To be ever present, though it always is
I rather yield to the waxing flames
I listen for the lightning names
To sound off in the dark distances
In dark divorce, in stark romances
There is ever still the light, the heat
The love that sits on supremacy’s seat
It is love that will aways guide me
I am sensing the poetic

Thursday, June 8, 2017

Simple


Simple
Sometimes I just try too hard to be poetic
Trying to turn every little detail of the day into something profound
All the while life stands there beckoning in all its grand simplicity
A conversation
A smile
A beautiful face
The clouds
The mountains
The rain
All these things in short refrains 
That don’t require any histrionics at all
They don’t require any deep thought or shame
Just simply a moment of pure joy
A seed
Which grows into a giant redwood
Something of eternal depth and height and weight
All from the living of life in the day
Within the day I’ve been given

Friday, June 2, 2017

Call to Arms


Call to Arms
There is nothing quite like the emptiness
Of a poet’s mind and heart
Staring at this blank piece of paper
With an even blanker mind
The heart numb
The spirit still 
And though my heart and soul and will
Long for a deep expression
The minutiae of the day 
Have drained it all away
Is this really any way to live?
Is this really any way to live at all?
A whim, an act, a curtain call
Then a glass of wine to wash the day away?
Listless sleep, a restless slumber
Then the agonizing buzz of a raucous alarm
The same damn time, the same damn number
To announce it is time to pretend again
Is this any way to live?
Is this really any way to live at all?
Is this even really living at all
Or is it merely cheap gyrations?
In the midst of all these frustrations
There’s nothing quite like the emptiness
So I, determined, pick up this pen
This is my sword
This is my dagger
And with the glory of a warrior’s swagger
I will stick it as deep into this slumber as I can

Just to understand what life and love can be.

Wednesday, May 24, 2017

Crest


Crest
Waves of anger and depression
Slapping against my being like gray waves
On a black sand beach
Too hot to walk on
Too dreary to sit and watch
So I’ll move along and check the swatch
Of this new satin and silky fabric
This stuff that is supposed to hold it all together
This stuff that brings happiness in any kind of weather
Oh look, the moths and the worms have left their say
I cannot speak, I cannot pray
Or I can but I’m afraid of what I will speak
Everything I’ve loved, I seek
But have found this place of dark derision
I have come to the point of stark decision
Do I jump into this mosh pit that I can see
Or do I wait for these things I cannot
This waiting is hell, it seems to go on eternal
This silence is torture, this noise is infernal
When all that my soul longs for is a sound
A sound that casts all to the ground
All that is not beauty, down

I still cannot hear it.

Maybe I should move
Maybe I should change my place
Maybe I should change my face
Like all the other superstars
Maybe I should join in the farce
Known as jaunty superstition and hype
Known as virtual expertise, so ripe 
Is the fruit of all our monstrosities
Painted to appear like lovely charities
We mock what we cannot know

I look to the mountains and see the snow
I long to know its cold, pure light.

I have wandered far, I have wandered here
I have left the wheel and refused to steer
The course that every other person seems to go
They ask and ask, I answer “I don’t know,
I have no idea of which way to go
And I’m not sure anyone else does either.”
I pause for a moment to enjoy a breather
And everyone else perceives it as ignorance
Simply because I am not speaking
They leave me standing there with the answer in my soul
So, that’s ok, I’ll just walk to whole
I’ll just meander myself off into the distance
I’m told I need a guide, a companion, a help
Yet all of these have seem to go their own ways
I look to stars, I lift my gaze
I decide to follow the whisperings of the wind
This wind, the last of my unseen friends
Begins to dance along the river
This place is good, my spine does quiver
In the knowing of nothing at all
In the understanding of almost everything
I feel a song, a dance, I sing
To a song that only the dogs can hear
A song I know and love so well
A song that makes the gray waves swell
Until they crest into a blue-green sea