Wednesday, January 30, 2019

Right



Right

I wish I could be confident
I wish I knew
The only thing I know
Is that I really don’t know

But I guess that’s a starting point 
That’s knowing a something

I look at the sunrise, the sunset
In an analytical way
What angle is the best to capture this
What will be the moment of best color

All the while I never really experience the moment

That is a parable of my entire life with God and others

That simple picture
Though staggering and painful and downright sad
Is simply the truth

It’s why I am not confident at all
Only my left brain is working
My right, in the stillness, is asking for just one chance

To let me know the great sunrise

1/30/19

Tuesday, January 22, 2019

New Day



New Day

It’s very hard to be a perfectionist
Because the very standard I use for me
Is the one I use for others
And everyone fails in this system, including me

Utterly
Miserably

Which makes me wonder

Maybe perfect is not the way any of us should be
Maybe I am fighting against a reality
That will never, ever move
I work so hard to test and prove
I am right
While all existence says “Not so.”

I’m not quite sure which way to go
But I do know I must turn away from here
This place that only knows judgment and fear
I must leave it at once

I have no idea where I am going
But anywhere else must be better
I might just need to write a letter
A letter of resignation to my former self

Clear these self-made trophies off of the shelf
Go outside, breathe the air
Look up to the mountains there
And take the worst photo I’ve ever taken
Laugh it off, let my perfection be shaken
Right off into the colors of the sunrise.

1/22/19

Sunday, January 20, 2019

The Rushing



The Rushing

Let’s just sit here and stare at the screen, shall we?
Let’s just sit here and stare
Thinking nothing, going nowhere
Life seems to be nothing
But a series of distracting interruptions
Destroying any sense of creativity
A giant ocean trapped by a dam of crumbling earth

How ridiculous is that?

Maybe that is the biggest frustration
Something infinite and grand
Seems powerless against a barren land

But all our great stories tell us otherwise
Often it isn’t what we see with our eyes

Often it is what we know with our hearts
Where beauty resides

Often there is the place of great freedom
The place of the unseen
Eternal hues of blues and greens

I can hear the rushing of the waters…

1/20/19

Wednesday, January 9, 2019

Authentic


Authentic
Just be yourself
Think for yourself
Don’t be an amalgamation of many people 

But aren’t we all an amalgamation?
Our DNA is the very display
Of thousands of others
But where did that all begin

It is there we find our answers 
Of who we really are 
Made from dust of sun and star
Or just a random lottery win
Where did all of this beauty begin again 
And where did it all go wrong
I could hide myself among a song
Or I could step out in the open
Knowing the sunlight will reveal it all

1/9/19