Saturday, July 23, 2016

Absolute Zero

Absolute Zero
Motion, motion
Constant motion
Like waves of water always yearning for the shore

Quiet, stillness
Is what I long for

Is this a moment for a both? For an and?
Is every moment an existence in tension?
Or does my heart simply long for a stability
Right in the midst of all this chaos?
In chaos the worlds began
The mesons still are quaking to this very day
From the sounds of His voice.
So why does my soul long for the stillness?
Why do I know you in the silence
In the places where no one else resides?
Has my heart chilled to absolute zero
The place where no one and nothing move
Yet there is no place such as that for You
Maybe that is all that really matters
I draw as close as I can to You
Then all the frozen simply falls away
Nothing left but stillness

The stillness of a love that can not be overcome

The stillness of a love in all of its fury

Thursday, May 26, 2016

The Moment

The Moment
There is a great heaviness on the carousel
This going round and round and round and round
The music of the grand calliope
Off keyed and somber now
After years of rust and rain
This necessary thing called pain
Supposedly a seed that grows in the furrows
Into some sort of beautifully lined fruition

Maybe it does
Maybe it doesn’t

There might just be a fragrance to the flowers
If I will simply choose to inhale slowly

The springtime air enters my nose
Fills my lungs
Finds its way to every single place in my being
There is a fragrance there I’ve never noticed
There is something there, something air
But I must turn aside to note it
What is this?
I see a eucalyptus, on fire
Yet not consumed
Suddenly, I sense the heaviness of a Spirit
Pressing out the heaviness of my soul
I think the former frightens me more
I know not what I came here for
Those things no longer carry any weight at all
Compared to this weight I feel, I crawl
To the point where I cannot go any further
Yet I must go further still
No human power, no human will
Could stand this any longer
But I will stay here until I’m stronger

Or I will stay here until I die.

K, Duane Carter 5/26/16

Image from Google Images and is not my personal photography

Wednesday, May 18, 2016



The very things meant to destroy your hearing
Will be used to spread the sounds of heaven everywhere
The very things meant to destroy your vision
Will be used to reveal the colors and the beauty of God
The things meant to destroy your soul
Will bring healing to the nations
God has spoken, it is true
Those things brought as destruction against you
Will be the very things that lift you higher
Higher than one has ever been before

So keep looking for the door

Saturday, August 1, 2015

How can one write a song
When everything inside is dead
In place of Nietzshche’s song of killing God
I have murdered my own soul instead
It was too much guilt to kill the great Creator
The One that loved me so,
So I turned my gun onto my heart
And pulled the trigger
Countless times
I kept pulling and pulling and pulling and pulling
Until I felt nothing
No fun, no peace, no desire, no yearning
Nothing but a determination
To survive in perfection each and every single day
Yet perfection never came
Perfection never comes
Now I feel nothing
Not the pain of defeat
Not the joys of triumph
Not the torment of love
Nor it’s deep satisfactions
Not the love for my wife, my children
Only the hate for my enemies
This burns on the embers
Of my heart’s ashen stone
So my work here is gasping
Short, darkened groans
There is no song in all of that
No dancing, playful rhythms

I hear Zephaniah

I hear a singing
I feel the airy movements of dance above
Just like the butterfly’s wing that causes the maelstrom
I sense a great destruction, a ferocious, deep love
A destruction of all that is darkness
All that is hopeless
I see a great wind that will blow this away

I hear Zephaniah

A kindling has fallen on the embers

K, Duane Carter 7/14/15

Saturday, March 28, 2015

She's Stil In There

She’s Still In There
Can eternity be buried by the sands of time?
Can the beauty ever, ever be removed from the rhyme?
Can the birds ever be silent at the brightening sunrise?
Can the soft eternal blue ever fade from your eyes?

Never, for you are still in there

Can life’s winding path through mountains and stones,
Can the pain of the heart, worse than the pain in the bones,
Can these silence all that is golden, even quiet the woods
Can the mystery of you ever be quite understood?

Never, for you are still in there

Could I ever know the ever deepening depths of your soul?
Could I ever feel a heart that is happy and whole?
Could I ever live a love, a life that’s divine?
Could I ever see a life, a love that’s sublime?

Always….for you are still in here

K, Duane Carter 3/28/15

Wednesday, March 18, 2015

Stuck Indoors

Stuck Indoors
I think I might just be a honey bee
Who has flown in through the open window, free
Now I find myself in an entirely different world
Flying and buzzing around, searching for something familiar, swirls
Searching for pollen, searching for water
But there is none of that here
Only expensive furniture and carpet and stone and slaughter
As on and on my unseen wings do drone
I am running out of energy seeking for home
I am running out of sustenance
I cannot find the escape
Maybe it is where I first began this journey, behind the dark capes
If I can only find my way back to the sunshine 

K, Duane Carter 3/18/15

Thursday, January 15, 2015

Time to Rise and Shine!!

I had an interesting experience this morning.  I was in my Thursday routine of getting the kids to school.  They always want to listen to the “John Tesh Radio Show” and I grudgingly oblige them each morning.  It’s not that I’m against music or radio or John Tesh, it’s just that I have a habit of it being quiet when I drive because it’s honestly the only quiet time I ever get.  However, I know the kids enjoy the music so I turned it on and turned it up.  I had dropped them off this morning and I was on my way home and there was a song that literally reached out and grabbed me.  After I went home and looked it up, I found it was Coblie Caillat’s song, “Try.”  The song’s verses sing out these lies that the world system tells girls all the time, and then the chorus sings out a message that you don’t have to try, try, try, try, try to fit into that mold.  Just look at yourself and love yourself.  Now before everyone goes, “oh yeah, more positive thinking blah blah blah” you have to know how the song ends.  It again says to look in the mirror and love yourself and then ends “Because I love (like) you.”  As I was listening to the song, I felt God stirring in me.  I knew I myself had listened to all sorts of lies, and I had tried very hard to fit into all sorts of molds to fit in:  the perfect and successful doctor, the awesome dad, the loving husband, etc., and I had blown it on all fronts.  However, here was God, using the song from a “secular” pop star speaking loudly and clearly to me with a very simple message:  “Be you.  I like you.  So like yourself, and be you.”  It rocked me in my very core.

I began to think after this how often I have heard God speak to me through the “secular” world.  I began to remember one time how one of my spiritual moms asked me what was in my heart while we were in the middle of a church class, and I began to play the song “One” by U2.  Someone in the class got very offended, but if you’ll look at the lyrics, they are amazing.  

I then began to think of how the Bible speaks of the glory of God filling the earth, and then there are verses that speak of how the knowledge of the glory of God will fill the earth.  I thought of how the Bible says it is the glory of God to hide a matter and the glory of kings (mankind) to discover it.  I began to see that in just being me, I was seeing God release His goodness and creativity through ALL music and art and film and work, not just what happens in a church or religious setting.

As I thought of this, it hit me.  This is my opportunity in life.  I have an opportunity to share with others that it is time to relax and be you.  It’s ok to let go of the wounds that have occurred at the hands of others when they judged you and criticized you and ostracized you.  It’s ok to let those go and be you.  It’s ok to enjoy what you enjoy.  God is in it.  I even predict that you’ll start hearing Him quite clearly in things that most religious groups would tell you to get away from.  God has put His glory in you.  Let it shine.  Don’t cover it up with masks that others have made for you.  I think one of the most effective ways to step into good emotional and mental health is to just be YOU.

Shine, bright one.

We all need your light.

Love ya!  Dr. C.