Grateful
Ah, for so long I have tried to be the poet extraordinaire
But, alas, my books just sit on the shelf
Not going anywhere
I made all sorts of excuses
It’s the modern day
No one reads poetry anymore
There has to be a video
There has to be a meme
Vacillating from one to another extreme
I have finally realized
I’ve tried too hard to be someone I’m not
Do that for too long and your soul will rot
To the point where even you notice the smell
The stench, the pain, there is no gain,
The wrench
That finally breaks the bolts from the tightening
Then comes that feeling that is all too frightening
The feeling of panicked disarray
The feeling of floating in outer space
Knowing you’re a million light years from anywhere
And nowhere is where you’ll always be
Sure that floating feeling is free
But freedom without any boundary is nothing less
Than death by lonely wandering
And that death is very, very slow
How do I get past this vaudeville show?
I do not know, I do not know
This seems to be my favorite answer
More and more popular it becomes by the day
I’m told to read, I’m told to pray
Yet silence has forever greeted me
I wish I could be more upbeat
Instead of this deadpan sullen
Yet there are days where these perceptions must come forth
There are nights where the soul is broken
There are lives in which living is not seen
I think it’s time to find the green
The life that comes from seeking light
But I’ve said that all before
It’s almost become a daily chore
Not the majesty and the mystery that it should
I sit and stare at a piece of wood
Waiting for it to save me
Can I find true life within a tree
Is it living
Or is it dead?
These voices go on and on inside my head
I could probably go on like this forever
So before I drone on into a cumbersome blather
I am simply going to stop
To say
Thank you for this day
kdc, 6/8/19