Stellar Orbits

Stellar Orbits

Life has boiled down to

10 million different diversions

All set in stellar orbits

All just shooting stars

A light, an explosion, a fading mist

Then a cold and empty blackness

Truly drifting through the night

If I draw my attention to the beckoning fire

If I dwell too long there

I begin to feel the voice of the heat

The pain of the cold

So instead of drawing closer

I choose to step away

The steps just quicken and continue

Now I’m in a land of complete desolation

Numb from head to toe

Numb into the eternal depths

That I thought were there for my safety

But they are not

They are not there for my safety

They are there to point me back to the fire

The places where there are both love and pain

The places where I live my name

Instead of seeing it freeze and crackle 

From a dead,cold whisper of time

I’m so glad the water isn’t frozen here

This place where the mind cannot fathom

There is only so far that mere knowledge can go

There is only so much depth to the snow

Before there is the force of the molten lava

Turning everything to water and steam

Held back by a thin crust of dark and earth

I have heard of mirth

I’ve heard its name

Yet this place I stand seems all the same

As any place I have ever been

I walk and walk but there is never a change of the scenery

It seems this one gigantic crag is always to my right

Always rising up to mock me

In its gigantic stillness, silence

Reminding me I have always been here

And just might always be

Stuck in an eternal, ephemeral circle

Of boredom and mere existence

I used to look for warmth, for light

Now my eyes know not what to look for

They simply peer at the ground

Not wanting to see the same monotony

The same leafless branches they’ve known before

I used to listen

For music, for dancing

For trust, for laughing

Yet I can only hear the emptiness, the frenzied stillness

Of billions of beating hearts

Their sounds not even touching the universe

Though that is what they were made to be

I think I’ll rest here for the night

This journey has made me listless

One day there will be a sunrise

To greet me when I awake

But for now I will lie down in silence

Watching the stellar orbits around me

Listening to the sounds

Of the vapors touching the skies