Divorce

Divorce

I am filled with vengeance

I have been since my youth

I do not like it there

It rises up against my will

No, it does not

I have trained myself to accept it

Now I choose to simply reject it

Every time it screams my name

Vengeance never solves anything

It simply creates a snowball of hatred

Rolling down an eternal hill

Growing, growing

In its potential for mass destruction

I will choose the sunlight

I will take hold of one ray at a time

The snow will melt

Spring is coming

Floral

Floral

This photo reminds me of God

He brings color to the gray

Life to the death

Never in a domineering way

But rather in the form of a flower

You can marvel

You can ignore

You can crush

You can explore

You can sing

All these options 

Where freedom rings

Are proof that he is there

I think I’ll sit here in my office chair

And be thankful I am free to see

Birth

Birth

I can feel the poems

Some are like angst and depression

Some are like joy and peace

Some the words flow like the winds

Some refuse release

I think those are the best ones

The ones  that stay locked in the womb

Awaiting just the right moment to be birthed

Crying, gasping for air

Blinded by the sudden light

Covered in blood and sweat and tears

Those are the best ones

The ones I cannot write

The ones that I must feel

And continue feeling deep in my spirit

Until I can take no more

Writing has been compared to chore

But I see it as much, much more

I see it as a new life beginning

Ocean Walk

Ocean Walk

I’ve reached the midpoint

The place where I have to turn

Going back where I came from

My way here was wondrous 

Boisterous, powerful 

Alone

I walked away from my childhood home

Until I could walk no further

I’ve reached the midpoint

The place where I have to turn

Going back where I came from

I’m going to walk back 

closer to the water

even though my foot prints may be erased 

I will have been able to touch infinity 

And that is good enough for me

Every shell

Every stone

Touched by the ocean water

Glistens and shines

They are so noticeably alive

Those that are dry

So dulled and lifeless

So I choose to walk near the water

Even though my memory is erased

I still will have glistened and shone

Even though my memory was erased

Even though everything was changed

When I walked away from my childhood home

I still will have glistened and shone

I still will have glistened and shone

Microscopic (Infinitesimal)

Microscopic

Most of the time it’s easier to do the “wrong” thing

It seems like holiness, perfection

Are just much too high

I can’t reach it

I can’t jump anymore

The pains in my feet go screaming galore

So I just simply sit down and stare

Then my head goes down

I look toward the ground

To see if there might be some happiness there

I seen an ant moving along

Taking the crumb back to the nest

His contribution, though a total success,

Will never, ever be recognized amongst the masses

But then I realize

It was recognized by me

So in this thought I feel quite free

To share

Keep being you

For one much greater than you

Sees

And knows

You are a total success.

Maybe not anywhere near my “best” but at the same time I get the sense this crumb will make a difference somewhere…

MishMash

MishMash

My logic and beliefs have worked me into a place

Where my own life is totally meaningless

I felt the inky black tar pulling me in

A small black hole here in the arms of the Milky Way

Small, but still no light could get through

Somehow wakefulness pulled me out of its throes

I still could smell the scent of woes

Lingering amongst my skin

I have no friends, I have no kin

Here in this place of foreign apparitions

Today I touched the black partition

That separated us from the world of the sane

The fright still grasps my soul, my feet 

Still know the sense of being the head

I hope I never know the dread

Of feeling overwhelmed again

“Happiness doesn’t come from what you have

It comes from what you are.”

Hmmmm

If that is the case I might be great

Or I might be on the path to destruction

Dismembered by the power of a gravity so great

No atom may enter untouched

“If I have many material goods, I will not have time to care

For the things I really love, then I lose my freedom.”

There is such goodness that comes from other worlds

Maybe this trip to the black holes of my own

Is showing me its time to look out to the Cosmos

To find the diversity of the light in the stars

I’m finding myself more in balance now

I’m finding the air to breathe

I think it’s time to sit here quietly

Taking the moments for simply enjoying the sun

I don’t know if I’ve lost or won

But I’m learning I cannot know it all

But I surely can let All know me

Traversing Oceans

Traversing Oceans

Often I’m writing poems

Even I don’t understand

The words just seem to flow from me

Like water from the hand

Though there is some deliberate direction

There is always also splash

The life seems just to splatter

It stains the crimson sash

I often love to drift along

Sail the open seas

And somewhere in the midst of it

I find out who is me

So try a little sailing

Open to the winds

You just might find your deliberate course

Becomes subject to beauty’s whims

There truly is the place of wonder

8/29/18